Revelations

Small revelations about myself have been bombarding me for a week or so. They run the gamut of emotional, physical, spiritual and everything in between. It’s pushed me to find a quiet mind place – place to dissect, delve, scrutinize, explore, eliminate, examine – you understand.

I’m not a huge self-discovery person so when a few things pushed at me I pulled them in and had to take a look.

First – alone time. Due to the extensive travel during my childhood with my Air Force father a type of wanderlust was created in me. Never one to want to be in one place for more than a few years (typical of duty stays in the military) I looked forward to the next place. As I’ve mentioned in previous blogs this kept me from developing friend making skills because, heck, you would move on soon enough. What it did create was contentment to be alone. There are good times for this, but when you are married, have children, working full time, and nearby family it might have instilled resentment that I would retreat, hide, mind wander and make myself comfortable with myself and not be available. Both of my kids are like this as well, especially my daughter.

I love the sound of chimes, bells, rain, ocean, flute, fairy songs, and soft breezes. I love the feeling in my house when there is no sound-no TV, stereo, electronics. Just the random outside noise of birds, dogs barking, the kids next door playing in their pool. I also enjoy my rock & roll, jazz, pop music playlists on my apple music – loud.

But like everything else, the when and where of these live inside me.

I have a friend who is retiring and said she wanted to come hang out at my house with me once she is free from the work day drudgery. I like it, and I know she will respect that sometimes I just have to be alone. My dear friend who moved to St. Louis (actually Edwardsville IL) understood this wonderfully. It’s a true blessing to be in tune with another human this way.

Hubby gets me, most of the time, and gives me space when required. It’s how we’ve stayed together for forty years – yep that’s right. The only human who doesn’t get this is my precious grandson. He is five, busy, silly, active and fun. He can’t understand why Nannie (me) won’t come play sometimes. I explain it, he says okay and is back in ten minutes with something new.

Writing for me is gradually coming together after fits and starts, and my current work is progressing. The first third is written, the next third is plotted and I know the end goal for it. It’s fun and plays in my head like a movie. I’m really digging my blog and have thought of reading it on a  You Tube channel as a companion  vlog, sort of twin telling. We’ll see. I keep pluggin away at the voice over auditions and know that once I get that first job things will fall into place. There is a lot of competition, but I’ve a great space for it, my own little sound proof studio, for learning the software and equipment to record, edit and produce really good work. Anyone have a VO job for me?

So I am slowly coming out of a gloomy funk thanks to weird physical stuff that I had no idea of the source of and it scared me, a lot. Kind of got a bit depressed with that, missing my BFF, needing to hide, and letting God fill me up.

I’m getting there.

Cheers!

-N

Anybody Out There?

When I created this blog it was intended to communicate, interact, and exchange ideas. I tend toward being a loner, not an introvert because I can schmooze with the best of them when it is required. Getting a smile back from the grocery check-out clerk gives me a great feeling. The idea I might have helped cheer someone’s day is wonderful. I try this on a lot of folks.

Conversation. I often enjoy it and I’m pretty good at keeping it going after learning a bit of the art of it, when and how to ask questions, and avoiding trite replies like “you’re kidding! really? no way!” and instead reply with “tell me more or that’s wonderful (or shocking) or I understand” which encourages engagement.

For several years I had a very best friend, one that would call me to check up, invite me over, get together for meals, she loved coming to my place to hang out. She taught me how to be a long term friend, since my youth was spent traveling to different stations my father was transferred to with the USAF. So friend making, true friend making, wasn’t part of my wheel house. My parents had their adult friends – most of whom worked with dad and moved where he did, but I really only had my sisters. Meeting her as an adult was enlightening to say the least. We took trips together, enjoyed music and wine together, loved the beach. But…she and her husband divorced and she moved to St. Louis to be with her elderly parents. We lost a lot of contact, and I lost that friend.

Her parents have both passed now, details of the estate have been sorted and she is staying in St. Louis until her daughter graduates high school. The light in this is she plans to move back to Tucson and I am thrilled.

Maybe I won’t give in so readily to my aloneness or that wee bit of melancholy you saw in last weeks post. BTW the test result from the 19th was good news. The room where I write, blog, do voice over, and sew in has become more and more about being in my own space. I covet my time in it.

However…back to the blog.

I don’t get many comments and I wondered why? Is there something I’m missing in what I share? If you have any constructive advice and comments I would love to hear them. More pictures, videos, book reviews, music reviews?

So I sit, praying for rain and cooler temps in Southern Arizona with a three hour YouTube video of fall rain playing on my laptop. I look forward to hearing from you.

Cheers!

-N

I’m back, but emotions are running high!

I’ve been on a brief blogging hiatus, spending time going between Catalina and Phoenix to take care of my grandson during the last three weeks of my daughter’s teaching schedule. I had days where I lived at her place in Phoenix, and then he would come down here and live with us. There were times it was hard for the little fella to get his bearings with the back and forth, and missing his mother.

During this time hubby has been working a crazy schedule giving neither of us good sleep and making us grumpy. So the two things together robbed me of time and blogging inspiration.

However I am ready to jump in.

Last week hubby’s two brothers came to town from Reno for the interment of their parents ashes. It was held at the Northminster Presbyterian church where they were married in 1956.

It was a very sweet and emotional service; my husband and his brothers honored their parents well.  Melissa and Charlie also came for the weekend. One special person was Janet Daub who was my mother-in-laws maid of honor came with her husband, Vic!

So four days of visiting family and friends, lots of cooking and cleaning, and so many stories with lots of laughter. Charlie got to know his two great Uncles from his grandfather’s side of the family well.

Now we have a week until the next visitor.👏👏

Saturday, my great niece, Kali will come down from Phoenix to spend the week with us. This will be her second summer doing this and we are already looking at fun things to do with her during her visit. She is a very sweet and fun almost teenager (no!!) and we are taking advantage of her willingness to hang out with us old folks 😎 She is excited about using the pool we just put in to keep us cool.

So I’m thinking of new topics, ideas, and life events to blog. Promise to have pictures.

Cheers!

-N

 

 

Monumental Road Trip – Introduction

Yep, we did it! We took two weeks and one day to drive from Catalina AZ to Orlando FL. As anyone who has done something like this knows not everything can be prepared for or anticipated, and the best perspective is “expect the unexpected.”

The first hurdle was hubby working 12 hour days right up to our departure. That made things hard to get ready and I hate packing for him! I mean seriously, I never get things quite right, so…this waited until the absolute last moment – like, the middle of the night before we planned to pull out at 7am. We packed the truck and the trailer, hooked the trailer _DSC0059 (2) (here after referred to as Daisy,) filled the truck with gas and managed to be on the road by 9am.

Ok so we tried!

Two weeks is quite a while, but in retrospect I brought way too many clothes and shoes. I know part of my rational was I would be in at least two different climates so I wasn’t sure what to bring. Our stop in eastern Tennessee would be during winter, with cold rain and fog, but central Florida would be warm spring tropical so you tell me – what would you bring?? Another thing that was big were the amount of tools hubby brought. Those filled the back of the truck. He and Aaron had plans to do a bunch of stuff to the 5th wheel while we were in Florida and since hubby has way more tools than son he brought them along. I’m talking shop vac, a ladder, a bag full of tie-downs, three tool boxes, etc., you get my drift.

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It was a fun trip. The best part is always the humans who are part of the adventure. We learned some history, saw a musical production, roamed three DisneyWorld parks, and spent too much money $$$, but we had a good time and didn’t fight too much. 😉👍

Cheers!

-N

 

The past showed up

Today was a day of story telling. It was fun, interesting, enlightening, and gave me lots of things to think about.

I had lunch today with a new and old friend. It was cool to make an acquaintance with someone I went to high school with. We moved in very different circles, so we were not really friends, but there were some commonalities. Now in the fullness of life we connected on many levels.

Her name is Loree and I look forward to knowing her better. She has had a very interesting life, and her passions have part of that history thing I love, and a love for books. We shared the things that consume us, for me writing and for her Titanic.

One thing we share is we both have widowed mothers. We had lots of similarities in our maternal relationships and we are both from families of all girls. We were talking about the lifestyles of elderly folks and while we were talking our very fun waitress, Amanda, shared that she had observed many loving couples of that certain age who, to her surprise, were not married and had no intention of marrying. Many of them would lose benefits should they remarry. Loree and I both shared that our mothers felt the same.

Here is a pic of Amanda who works at Chili’s on Oracle in Oro Valley. Shout out to Amanda! She does a great job.

So my walk down memory lane was also one that made me realize I have forgotten a lot of people. Kind of strange experience. Loree has kept track of so many of our classmates and it was so interesting to hear what had gone on while I moved on.

So, to catching up and carrying on. Let’s see what happens.

Cheers!

-N

 

My Friend

I’ve spent the last few months wondering where a new friend right here in good old Tucson would come from. My long time bff moved away, a sad and revealing time, and my mind found that the loss of my close buddy left an empty spot.

So…I’ve started looking around in all the places prospective friends might linger and discovered most of the peeps I’m close to don’t live near me.

Is it me?

But then, out of the blue, someone I went to school with made contact with me on Facebook. What’s interesting is I didn’t remember this person from high school. High school was no picnic for me. I went to one high school for the first two years, then the last two years at another. Made it hard to connect with people who had gone to school together all of their lives. I was an outsider. No fond homecoming or reunion moments for me.

Back to the friend. What has been special is that she has sought me out and we have had fun connecting. I won’t say re-connecting since no connection was ever made. Yet it is there, and she is a very interesting person. We have lunch planned for Thursday. Yay!

I will keep you posted.

Cheers!

-N

What makes a friend?

What makes one human appealing as a friend? Are there certain characteristics and behaviors that attract others and draw them into a circle of friends?

Because my father was military we moved a lot when I was young. Consequently my friendships were very transient.  I believe this made it difficult for me to form lasting friendships.  My sisters and I are close, but they now have their own families to concern them. I had no real idea of what a lasting friendship looked like.

Until I met Kristen. For some reason she wanted to be my friend.

We met at work in 1985 and are still friends to this day, although she now lives in  St. Louis. We connected immediately, even though she was ten years younger than I. She would call me and want to hang out, would invite me to join her for a weekend at Rocky Point, Mexico. She thought of me when she was going somewhere and would often get me a small gift. She would drop in with a rose bush or small tree for my yard. She spent weekends with Chuck and I and the kids, she liked being with us.

She taught me how to be a friend. When she married I actually was a bridesmaid, not the wedding singer I usually was (although I did sing a song too), which felt very special. We spent lots of years enjoying our families together.

Her move made me realize I didn’t have a network of friends.

The people I know don’t seek me out. I would love to have a couple of girlfriends to do things with yet, I hesitate. Maybe I’ve become the kind of human that others say “Hi” to but I offer nothing to motivate them to be buddies. Perhaps I need more self reflection to know what is about me that keeps acquaintances from getting closer. I see pics on social media of people getting together, making the effort to connect, enjoying human interaction, and it gives me pause.

I know writing and sewing are solitary activities, but I love talking and laughing at happy hour or at my house with the music playing and a bonfire fire going and sharing a bottle of wine with friends.

Is it me?

Cheers!

-N

A flurry of good

I’ve posted recently about Chuck’s lay off and his job search. This has been the soundtrack running in the background of the last few weeks. He had an interview with his first choice, then got a call back from them for a second interview and was given the non-official thumbs up. 20160416_201738_resized

We had a celebration dinner with Chuck’s buddy Bob and his wife Kim at the Silver Saddle Steakhouse. It was old, had great ambiance, wonderful food and was packed.  20160416_203418_resized

We talked and laughed together while enjoying the fact that Chuck had worked hard at his job hunting and almost by accident found a position he was perfectly suited for.  He and Bob were both glad Chuck found something here in Tucson so they could continue to golf, target shoot and talk hunting.

Last Friday Chuck was called and officially offered the job. They contacted him this morning about coming in to do his new hire paperwork! God was smiling on us!

The second bit of good was receiving the proof of my paperback last Monday. I spent this last week taking my time as I poured over the story looking for formatting, typo and grammar issues. I found a few things but overall it was in great shape. It was a surprise how different it looked in book form and the things that stood out on the page.  As I was reading through it, the story captured me. I got involved in it again, the way I did when I was writing it.

Today I plan to work on those corrections and get the final draft ready for the reading public. When it is ready I will post the link here and on my Facebook author page.

Another good thing was my hubby becoming a fan of Don Massenzio’s books. He read Blood Orange and has started on the Frank Rozzani Detective novels. It’s great he loves reading as much as I do. It’s also cool he found books he likes written by a blogger friend.

Shout out to Don!

Cheers!

-N

 

So ya’ll, let’s talk

Well it appears life went on while I had my head wrapped up in stuff. Stuff, that’s all I can say to describe it.

Chuck’s interview went okay, he felt positive and now we wait and see.  I hope they call him. He is still putting the applications out there. He and I cleared my office library of most of my books. I only kept my research materials and the fiction hardback book shrine. Chuck’s Clive Cussler and Louis L’Amour, and my Janet Evanovich and P.D. James for example. They comfort me.

The big bookshelves are moving out and I will make a sewing corner in here. It really will be my woman cave!! I will have writing, music, books and sewing. The wine cabinet is around the corner. He may never see me again.

I ordered the proof copy of my book and look forward to seeing it and making sure it is the best it can be. Looks like it will be available for sale by the first of May. When that happens dreams come true. I will post a link at that time.

We had dinner Friday with Rick and Jayne Kelly, our long time neighbors, at Bubb’s Grubb (yes it is a real place and so Catalina.) We’ve watched each others kids grown up. It was so relaxed and fun, and Jayne and I decided it needed to happen more. The weather was starting to change, cooling off and sprinkles, which makes Jayne and I very happy. She and I are both cold weather fans. Before you say anything about us not knowing what cold weather is Jayne is from Minnesota and I lived in northern Japan and North Dakota. It is just our nature, and we commiserate when it gets hot here.

Saturday was a day spent running errands, cleaning around the property and enjoying the cool temps. Millie rode around with us for most of the day and when we stopped into Rawhide Feed store in Catalina for finch seed, she sat very well next to me while Chuck shopped. Some people came in the door and I heard “there’s a live animal.” The said they were on a scavenger hunt and one thing they had to do was pet a live animal. As they petted her they took pics for proof. I asked if they would email me the pics for the blog but I haven’t heard anything from them. If I get the pics I will post them.

Saturday night was spent watching my hillbilly buddies on “Mountain Monsters”. I freakin’ love those guys. They make me laugh out loud at their antics. I would love to crash through the woods following Wild Bill and Huckleberry.

Sunday started out very relaxed with coffee on the back porch, then we went to worship at Casas Church. The music was amazing and while the pastor was talking it started to rain, and I’m talking a roof pounding deluge. It was so cool. The rest of the day it rained off and on and when our friends Bob and Kim Violette came over for dinner, we sat eating, listening to jazz and the rain. Perfect.

Filled the bird feeders, had coffee and did some yard work. Now I’m at the computer.

So ya’ll. Tell me what you did this weekend. Now, here we are dear readers. I changed my page theme this morning. What do you think?

Cheers!

-N

David Bowie

I remember the first time I saw a picture of David Bowie and it confused me. Who was he? What was he? Even in my teenage confusion I was also immensely curious about this human.

Now he’s gone.

I had a gay friend who loved Bowie. George knew every song lyric and I think he might have wanted to be Bowie. After George’s death Bowie was always linked in my mind to my friend. That’s okay, I think Bowie would have been glad to know it.

I can’t say he was one of my favorites but I did react to his music when I heard it. I was a ZZ Top, Led Zepplin, Fleetwood Mac, etc music listener in my youth. Rock and Roll with guitars, bass and drums-loud. His style was so fluid and compelling. Fame!

My daughter watched The Labyrinth all the time. It was one of her all time favorites and when she found out I knew who Bowie was when I was her age she was blown away.

Yes your mom’s old but she is also cool!!

Also he had two different colored eyes-that’s majestic!!

Rock on- Let’s Dance.

-N