I’m hiding out again

Yes I’ve been hiding out, only talking to a few people by phone. It’s hot out and I don’t like it. My air conditioned house has been my hide-out. I’m thinking a lot and my mind is wandering all over the place. My dreams have been crazy, very busy with places and people, causing me to be very restless in my sleep.

My newest story is slowly forming on paper. I know who some of the people are and a little about their personalities. They are like new and interesting people you meet at a party and only have a few minutes to get acquainted before it’s time to leave. I have a couple of them well planted in my mind. The sound of their voices are clearer. Some of the relationships are materializing like cirrus clouds high in the jet stream.

I am starting to tease out their stories. Their backgrounds and needs are pushing through. But there are several who are only ghosts floating through my pen as I construct the diorama of this location. This story has been pounding into my brain the way a song lingers in your mind. Dialogue passes through and pictures of scenes, but they aren’t connected yet.

I’m looking for a mystery. One that is old enough the clues aren’t obvious. Any suggestions? Who is there? This can get messy when I don’t focus on what is already set in place.

What do you do when you are looking for the next step, the next phase or the next light bulb moment? I guess I retreat and retrench. I’m a bit muddled in my feelings and the next few days personally will need me to let this flow. My wine is good and my paper calls.

This story is bubbling just a few thoughts away.

Oh I will be getting a puppy. A beautiful German Shepherd female. Perhaps she will be my muse.

-N

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Looking down

Been two weeks since I blogged. Spent these two weeks hanging with my husband while he was here. Here goes-hang with me on this one.

For the last week I have had the strangest dreams.

Let me clarify, I dream in full color, sounds, smell, taste-the whole deal.

These dreams have all had something to do with space-sort of my own Dr. Who type dreams. Weird and sometimes distressing situations that I can’t seem to get resolved.

Also let me clarify more: I talk to myself while I dream.

Anyway, I can usually turn things around or adjust the direction my dreams are going and move the action around. However this has not been the case in these last dreams. It was becoming frustrating and aggravating. I would wake up and tell my husband all about it.

Third clarification: I remember all of my dreams, or at least most of them.

I know that dreams mean something, at least I’m pretty sure of it but I have not been able to  tie them to anything or find a cohesiveness in them. And what is all of the space crap? I am not a huge sci fi fan but I do like my Dr. Who. What else could this have to tell me and where is all this going?

Well two nights ago I realized what all of these dreams had in common. I wasn’t in them! I was not in my dreams. I was a character in the dream but not myself. How weird it that? I, me, Nancy was watching the dreams they way one would watch a TV show. There was the character in the dream and I was watching the character and the dream unfold from above or away.

Ok, new to me. What do you think this means?

Let me say last night it wasn’t like this at all because I am having bronchitis and feeling poorly. The meds make my dreams dull and stupid.

-N